Parents only want what is best for you. At the same time parents also understand that these are the years that you as an indivdual are starting to understand who you are and how you will turn out in the future. If your parents do not understand you, then you and your parents should do something that few people seem to do these days, Talk.
This is not a confrontation, this is you explaining what you want in a clear tone that is level. Explaine your point of view from your perspective. Be prepared to defend your position with reason and listen to what their objections are, then address them in a reasonable way.
This will help you understand what they are thinking and why they have concerns, then it is up to you to alleviate their concerns with a reasond and sound discussion.
You will benefit and they will as well, I know I did this with my children and even thought they had a sound argument, they were not always in the right. The same went for me as their dad, I was not always right as well.
So you allow your teenagers some latitude and compromise, with that also come responsibility for your actions, with responsibility there is accounability, if you truly need something or ask for something, remember if it is approved you must abide by your agreement.
If you do this, your parents will not see you as complicated, they will see you as a responsible person who can be trusted to make sound decissions, with that comes more choices and a great relationship with your parents.
Good Luck
PeaceI've always wondered why I parents are slow to understand teenagers?
Don't know after all they used to be teenagers themselves
They spoke slang and listened to music that ';Your mother wouldn't like';
no matter what decade or century we live in, parents will never ';understand';, thats because of the generation gap. most parents were their kids' age twenty to 40 years ago when things were a lot different,and different things were acceptable,and not acceptable.know what i mean?
A part of it is not really listening. parents try to listen, but sometimes in the back of their mind they are making a check list of everything they need to do.
i think parents think that since they used to be teenagers, they understand exactly what we're going through, but things have changed and our parents expect us to do things they used to do but now look down upon.
i think that it is just that they do not want you to make the same mistakes that they made growing up.
Being a teenager once myself...yes, teenagers are complicated. Emotional, raging hormones, trying to establish individuality and autonomy, sex, frontal lobe not quite yet fully developed...I could go on. It's not that they don't understand you, it's they don't want you making the same mistakes they did. They look back and slap their foreheads saying, ';what was I thinking?';
Parents understand teenagers. They just dont want to show it :-) just in case they are asked to agree too
trust me, they arent slow. it may seem that way, trust me i know. the only thing is they are trying to keep you safe, and to teach you whats right in life. so im may seem otherwise
Haha well. most people have different mentallity. they think and see things in a different perspective.
Anyways. im sure they(ur parents) know what its like to be a teenager cuz they were once a teen too.
As you see more things around u and get experiences u will understand. And of course u muz look things in 2 different direction. your self and others. esp your parents.
(: all you need to do is just think and understand. you will soon get it . :D everyone will wan things to go their way.
Wait until you're an adult... you'll see.
I think you have it backwards. Teenagers don't understand what adults understand, that they've lived through adolescence, and so much more.
You need to trust that adults actually DO know what they're talking about.
I think communication is key. My parents stopped, or really didn't ever keep the lines open, and when teen years came - I rebelled and they looked the other way. I will not do that to my kids. Teens need more love - not less.
That is your misconception... we totally understand you teens.. You teens just dont want to listen to the parents who know a heck of a lot more than you do..
You guys are way too busy thinking you know everything, and thinking that your experiences are somehow complex and special when infact they are in the grand scheme of life totally unimportant.
You kids seem to forget that us parent were teenagers too, and there is nothing you do or think about that we havent already done or thought about.
You think we dont understand you, but all we are trying to do is to protect you from doing or having something done to you that is bad or wrong... Like I said we have done it already and made those same mistakes, and we want to protect you.
Trust me, you are definitely not complicated.. You guys are so easy to read, its almost funny.
If you feel like you arent understood, its because you dont like what you are hearing. It goes against what you want instead of what is best.
You should listen to your parents, for they know alot more than you, and when you are even a few years olderm you will know a ton more too... Then a few years after that... even more.
You will understand when you decide to be a parent, and you will be sending sincere apologies to your parents, because you will finally get it.
With life comes experience, and with experinec comes knowledge.
It's not that they're slow to understand. It's that they're terrified you'll make the same mistakes they made when they were your age. They want to protect you from that rather than watch you go through the same agony.
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